The Burnt slow-roasted Honey-mustard Chicken:
For the "glaze", I used about 3 1/2 Tbsp of 2 different kinds of mustard: a spicy dijon and a stone-ground. To this, I added an equal part of honey, then a splash of olive oil to thin it out a bit:

I tossed the chicken into my roaster, and poured the honey-mustard mixture over the top, slightly spreading down the sides and onto the wings (there's no reason to coat the bottom, since this is where the juices normally go anyhow). Add water to the bottom of the pan, so any drippings won't burn and make the smoke alarm go off:

(If you're using a kosher chicken, don't forget to remove the wing tag - that doesn't go too well with the rest of the meal)

Put the chicken into a preheated 300-degree oven. I suggest using a meat thermometer to judge when the chicken is done. Mine plugs in and impatiently lets me know when it's halfway done, almost done, and take it out of the oven already (relatively cheap at Williams-Sonoma). The cooking will take between 2 and 4 hours, depending on the size of the bird:

While the chicken was cooking, I got started on prepping the rest of the food items for consumption later. Since my oven only has one rack, and I failed to roast garlic earlier, I dry-roasted some garlic in a non-stick pan. Turn the heat on medium and put the skinned garlic cloves in the pan. Turn the cloves every once in a while - you can press on them to see when they're done (they'll be somewhat soft and fragrant). These will be used in both the carrot puree and the spinach:

For the Crunchy Greens Asian Salad:
I had some celery and cucumbers in the fridge, and since I didn't think that there were enough "real" veggies being served with the meal, I threw this together. Cut the cucumber and celery into matchsticks, then put them into a medium lidded container. Atop the c&c, pour about 1 1/2 Tbsp stir-fry sauce (I used some orange-ginger sauce I had on hand), 1 glug of vinegar (I'm all out of rice vinegar, so I used some red wine vinegar), and 1 small glug of sake (I used this because of the lack of rice vinegar - you could probably do without, if you wanted to). Add salt, pepper, and some ground hot pepper flakes, put the top on the container, and toss until well-coated. All done! Put into the fridge until you're ready to eat:

For the Curried Carrot Purée:
About an hour before the chicken is done, top the carrots, and cut into halves (I used about 10 small-medium carrots). Cover the carrots with water (normally I use No-chicken broth or similar, but once again, I was out), and put on the stove on high. Once the carrots come to a boil, lower the heat, cover, and let simmer for 45 minutes. If you have more carrots, or if the carrots are massive, it may take more time for the carrots to be soft.

Once the carrots are fork-tender (they should be speared easily with a fork and/or fall apart when speared), use a slotted spoon to take the carrots out of the water or broth and put them in a food processor. Add a glug of soy milk, 2Tbsp of margarine (olive oil works well, if you're not into the margarine thing), 2 cloves roasted garlic, 1Tbsp medium-hot curry powder, and 1/2C of the water or broth in which the carrots were simmering.

Puree the carrots until the consistency of thin mashed potatoes. They shouldn't be runny, and thick enough to keep their shape when doled out. If you aren't a fan of curry, these carrots are also wonderful without the extra seasoning. Once the processing has been completed, they're all ready to be served up!

For the Garlic-wilted Spinach:
About 15 minutes before the chicken is done, slice 4 cloves of roasted garlic and put into a small sealable container. Add 1Tbsp good olive oil, 1Tbsp water, and 1/2 Tbsp roasted garlic dressing mix. Shake all of the above the mix fully, then spread across the bottom of a non-stick pan.

Put the pan on a medium burner and wait until the garlic starts to sizzle. Add the spinach (I used a bag of organic baby spinach from the salad aisle), and toss carefully to coat. Turn the heat up to medium-high and add 1/2C of the carrot water. If you don't have carrot water, just use normal water. Cover, and let steam for about 45 seconds. Uncover and let the rest of the water dissolve. Salt and pepper the spinach to taste, and it's ready to eat!

The chicken, revisited:
Once the timer goes off (or you've tested the chicken to make sure all the juices run clear and all that), remove from the oven and let sit for about 5 minutes - the honey-mustard glaze should have caramelized and burned, hopefully without making your kitchen a smoky mess. It's important that the chicken be cooked at such a low temperature to make sure the glaze doesn't burn too quickly. Carve and peel the skin away before serving. The meat retains some of the honey-mustard taste, but not enough to overpower the delicate yumminess of the poultry. It should be incredibly juicy. I saved all of the bones and extra meat (including the "burnt" water underneath the chicken) with which to make broth later... enjoy!